In relationships we focus so much on appearances. Appearing to be the perfect couple to our spectators… the perfect significant other to your partner… We’re caught up in saying the right thing or doing the right thing – but what if the “right” thing is a stark comparison to who you are; contradictory to what your heart is feeling and to that for which your soul is yearning?
You’re afraid that the other person will no longer feel you’re the perfect match or that you don’t love them the same way they love you. Afraid that those on the outside peering into your window won’t understand or find you to be unworthy of the other person.
So you choose to be silent. You choose to fit the mold. You choose to be uncomfortable for what you think might benefit you in the long run.
Is keeping up the appearance worth losing sight of or altering who you are at the core? After all, the other person is in a relationship with you for… you… right?
Saying what you need to say just might be what that other person needed to hear. It may save their life. It might inspire change. It could encourage them to speak their own truth. On the other hand, saying what you need to say might be the very thing that causes that person to walk out of your life… and that’s okay. It’s okay because it allows them to walk away with who they are still in tact and they leave you to be who you are for someone else who needs you to be you.
There should be no fear, no shame in being the greatest thing you could ever be and the one thing no one else in this world could ever be even if they tried… you.
“You’d better know that in the end/It’s better to say too much/Than never say what you need to say again/Even if your hands are shaking/And your faith is broken/Even as the eyes are closing/Do it with a heart wide open.”
-John Mayer, “Say”
So say what you need to say. Say it with love, with an open heart, with an open mind… but also with an open ear. None of us would truly be able to say what we needed to say if no one was there to listen. All of that talking really would just be a bunch of noise…
-Love & Light… CB Radio
So, what about you?
What have you been afraid to say? What have you regretted not saying? What have you said that you felt went unheard? What do you wish a loved one would have said?