They come over unannounced, call your man at all hours of the day or night, and are always making plans that take away from your quality time with your man! Whether he refers to them as the “fella’s”, “homies”, “boys” or “guys; they are your man’s friends and they are always around! They are invading your personal space and monopolizing all of his free time. It’s a constant battle over who is going to get to spend time with him, you or his friends. We at EGL understand that dating a man that has a strong “bro-mance” may be stressful on the relationship. No woman wants to feel like they are competing for their man’s attention but what do you do when that’s exactly what you have been doing? Even though it is frustrating to date a man who hangs out with friends, parties and socializes frequently; it doesn’t mean that it is impossible to have a successful relationship. Follow these tips on how to overcome this issue without making him feel like you are asking him to choose.
Tips on how to be the other woman in a “Bro-mance”
Set a Date: If it is hard to spend quality time alone with your boo because he is always hanging with his boys, try to set a reoccurring date night with him. It can be weekly or monthly but let him know this is the day you two spend together, uninterrupted. This gives you the attention you need while giving him enough time in advance to alter his plans with his friends.
Phone Curfew: You both can discuss and agree on a time when you both turn your phones on silent or off. This extra time at night will give you guys more time to relax and spend more intimate time together.
Group Fun: It sometimes is difficult to not feel like the 3rd or 5th wheel when hanging out with your man and his friends. So why not invite your friends to along too. This way it will be group fun and you won’t feel so compelled to focus on the fact that you don’t have your man’s undivided attention.
Women should never make their mate feel pressured to distance themselves from their friends. But at the same time, women should emphasize the importance of quality time, especially if a lot of the other free time is consumed by so many other people. A healthy relationship is about the system of checks and balances; being heard by your mate is just as important as listening to your mate. So, be sure to discuss the need for you to be satisfied in the relationship, without him having to give up on his need for friendship.