You were worse than hearing that song they play twenty times in an hour on the radio. You echoed too loudly in the back of my head. Your insults cut deep into my throat, drowning me in a pool of lies and deceit. I choked on your stench; it’s intoxicating. I would give anything to erase all of our memories, and I would die to be able to move on from our past.
There was once a time where I loved hearing your laugh. It would brighten even the darkest of days. Your eyes would glitter with a playful light, and I couldn’t refuse your incessant demands for my attention. I found comfort in your touch, even though your skin was powdered with poison. I was so lost in the euphoria of our relationship that I couldn’t see even the most blatant red flags. You had me fooled- we were going to fall madly in love until the ends of time. You were going to support our family, and we would live happily ever after. But all good things come to an end, and all evil things can disguise themselves as innocent.
I took one step towards you, glass shards littering the path. My hands were stretched out as far as they could go, desperately trying to reach you. My feet were pierced and bleeding, my tears falling rapidly and mixing with the blood. My heart was broken, but I was too stubborn to understand that I had asked for this all along. You turned your back on me, “Maybe later…”, you shrugged. I was little more than the earth beneath your feet. You walked away as easily as you had shattered my glass heart. I was left standing in my ruins, to clean up the mess you left behind. Some dared to come and try to help me clean up…but I was terrified that their feet and hands would soon be pierced by the glass as well. I would push them far away, causing more glass to grip the bottom of my feet in an effort to protect those who came close. The glass gave this terrible glow, making me look so enticing and inviting, like an angel sent from the heavens. From a distance, you couldn’t tell that I was engulfed with pain.
Day in and day out, I suffered a terrible loneliness, just wanting the comfort of something familiar. I would look up at the skies from my glass prison and scream to the clouds. “You abandoned me!” I yelled repeatedly, whoever was up there was bound to hear me. A loud thunder responded, raindrops falling heavily on my shoulders. “You were never here to begin with!” I growled, stomping my feet down on the glass, the sting was so familiar that I was practically numb. The thunder continued and a crack of lightening torched the sky. The clouds meshed into one another, forming a heavy mass above my head. I glared into the rain; this was surely what I deserved. I was going to drown myself in storms of sorrows. I picked up a piece of glass, it glistened in the rain. My reflection stared aimlessly back at me.
For the first time, I looked into the eyes of someone hurting. They were desperate for sanctification. Their blue tint was shadowed with pain and desperation. Tears streamed from their tear ducts, flooding the reflection. I glanced back up at the sky, lightening now danced from cloud to cloud.
“What do you want from me…” I pleaded, falling to my knees. A gust of wind blew my hair backwards. It was powerful, yet warm and encouraging. The rain began to let up, eventually becoming a drizzle. A light descended from the sky, and I cowered in fear. I covered my eyes for the glow was too bright for my human eyes. I could still hear the thunder, but it was muted. The light wrapped itself around my body, warming the insides of my bones. I jumped to my feet, and yelped when there was no stinging. The glass had disappeared, in fact there was not a trace of it to be seen! My scars were gone and the stains of blood were washed away. The light danced around me, filling me with complete jubilee. I chased it up and down mountains, through puddles and oceans, never satisfied with the little tastes I would receive. I could tell I had found Love, I had found Safety, and I had found Forgiveness. It was warm and renewing, faithful and protective of my soul. I was so caught up in the beauty of my new life, I hadn’t even noticed I had been given a new heart- one that wouldn’t shatter, one that wouldn’t crack and break.
And the light whispered to me “And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.”